The Sweet Revenge of Empathy

Jeremy had always been the king of "I'm almost ready." To him, clock hands were little more than decorative features on the wall, artistic details that had no business dictating the pace of his life. Janice, on the other hand, was constantly on the verge of a nervous breakdown because of her husband's chronic lateness. Their ongoing battle over time eventually brought them to the office of Dr. Kaufman, a couples therapist with methods that were, to put it mildly, highly unconventional.

"To save your marriage, you need to develop genuine empathy," Dr. Kaufman explained, handing them each a cup of herbal tea with a strangely sweet aroma. "You need to literally walk a mile in each other's shoes."

They drank the tea. Jeremy assumed it was just another cheesy metaphor from a relationship counselor.

He was tragically mistaken.

The following morning, Jeremy woke up feeling the weight of long, curly black hair spread across his pillow. When he turned to look beside him, he found his own male body sleeping soundly, snoring away. The panic lasted about ten minutes before the shock gave way to an inconvenient reality: they had Janice's parents' wedding anniversary dinner that evening. And Janice, now occupying Jeremy's body, was determined to get even.

"Jeremy, if you make us late tonight, I swear I'll use your credit card to buy myself an entirely new wardrobe!" Janice's deep masculine voice echoed from the hallway.

In the bedroom, Jeremy, now inhabiting his wife's elegant curves and perfectly made-up face, glanced at the clock on the dressing table. They had two hours before the event. In his former life as a man, two hours was practically an eternity. Plenty of time to watch a football match, take a nap, and squeeze in a five-minute shower.

Settling into the satin chair, Jeremy stared at the vast collection of makeup brushes, eyeshadow palettes, and perfume bottles. A stubborn little smile appeared on his new, full lips. If he was Janice now, he intended to experience the whole package.

He picked up a golden perfume bottle and slowly sprayed the fragrance along his neck, taking his sweet time. Then he adjusted his champagne-colored silk robe, admiring his reflection in the mirror with all the patience in the world. Every movement was carefully calculated to test the limits of his wife's sanity.

"Jeremy! Have you even taken a shower yet?" Janice pounded on the door, her voice filled with the same anxious urgency that had once belonged to her. "Traffic is going to be terrible!"

"Relax, darling," Jeremy replied, testing Janice's soft, melodious voice and thoroughly enjoying the irony. "Time is an illusion. I'm just applying some moisturizer. We have all the time in the world."

"Moisturizer?! Jeremy, we have forty minutes left! You haven't even started putting on that layer of plaster you call makeup!"

Jeremy stifled a laugh and released another cloud of perfume into the air. For the first time in years, he was beginning to understand just how much time each beauty ritual could take. But watching Janice pace impatiently in the living room, desperately checking the clock every few seconds, was simply priceless.

The revenge of empathy was slow, beautifully blended, and absolutely intoxicating.

If you suddenly switched bodies with your partner, what everyday habit of theirs would you be most tempted to teach them a lesson about?