The New Stadium Muse

I used to say those girls on the field were just there for “decoration.”

“You want real action? Watch the game, not the sideshow,” I’d tell my buddies, rolling my eyes every time one of those promo girls came on screen.

Guess who woke up this morning in full glam, holding a soccer ball, wearing a crop top so tight I can hear my abs breathe?

Me. I did.

Apparently, I “won” some magical fan promotion. Out of millions, I was chosen to be today’s stadium muse — and not just as a muse, but in the body of one. Hair, curves, outfit and all. I even have her schedule: enter the field at halftime, strike some poses, hype the crowd, and “don’t forget to smile.”

And the worst part? I think I am smiling. The sun, the cheers, the way people looked at me like I was the event — it’s weirdly addictive.

My old self would be screaming.

But right now? I’m just hoping someone took a good picture of me.